Chapter 2: Life can be a shock, a pain and a burden
Do you know the feeling of knowing your most probable future? It feels like you lived with too much observation from your own, and now you know the patterns of your life. You know that no matter how your irrational mind try to delusionally fantasize about a great, so wished future, the chances of this future actually come true are very dim (and ever shortening due to the time pass).
It’s like that to me, an irrational part of myself, always come up during my day with thoughts of me and “probable” partners, wish is absoluty, ultra, super, mega fake, and would be stupid of my part, and such a waste of time to even given a grasp of hope to these thoughts, that leads to nothing but more suffering, frustation and shame.
But inside of me there is another part that always fights back with brutal doses of reality, not letting myself ever being fooled by the idiotic hopeful self, though this an enemy i can’t kill for all eternity. But i will tell you the true, the good things that happens to catch my thoughts during the day, those would be really great to have, yet, unhappily, those never happen…
Yo solo no tengo una respuesta, pero la vida es una bosta…
What is life, if not a fucking disgrace?
Pardon me, for my winding, of course life is not bad or good, life is just life, with good and bad moments. But today i saw how a pain in the ass life can be, when it deprives you from obtaining things that you long the most. Like a realationship with someone. You walk around, and every person you seem to meet (and interest you) is either with someone else, or going on this direction, or maybe even they prefer no one rather than you (plus my inability to achieve a relationship). Well, i’m walking a path of uncertainty, i know that i’m trying, and maybe “going” on the right direction, but i do not know, if i will arrive at the destination, life is just like that, you get no guarantee or warranty from it, only a possibility.
Se burro … la vida es una desgracia!
Why have i created this blog?
For a long time i have been feeling this need to create a place on the internet where i could share with the world, on a deep level, my history (or part of it). I will tell you from my everyday life to my financial terms, and my future beliefs and objectives. I wish to be the inspiring history of sucess people will know.
This is the story of Black US XY, the only one.