During this period of absence i have been proven wrong, time and time again about convictions i hold strong about myself, and things i thought i had overcome. Oh how dearly wrong i was to assume such things! Now i’m still paying the price, and trying to get out from this period which i call the darkest of my life ever.
But enough with that, though i thought (and still do when i’m there *Most of the time*), i force myself to belive there is a way out. Do you wanna know the good side? I really opened myself up to things that i was previously too much “materialized” to do.
No matter how much i sometimes though to help others, i was too insensitive, and didn’t understand how/why people help others (not that i didn’t helped anybody, but i wasn’t the guy you could count to make donations, of both time, money, or anything to other people, only a few which called my attention). But now, even if i don’t enjoy things i used to as much (i actually don’t even do them anymore), i find joy in helping other people, and being good in general.
This is surely a good thing to do, i’m not out of the pit i find myself into, but i will not increase others suffering too, i can’t afford to do this.
This explains what happend in thins while, or at least, all that is really important to share.
Now i hope you are doing well, truly, from heart, and if not, that you find what you are looking for!
Yours, Black US…